Category: parenting

Mental Health, parenting

Why is every job a mom does considered a job…. except being a mom?

Katrina Russell

We’ve all heard the chiche about a mom being a chef, taxi driver, maid, nurse, accountant, personal shopper, and the rest. It’s become a meme. There is a great video about “The World’s Toughest Job Interview” about just this. If you haven’t watched it then I suggest that you check it out.

When people say that they are stay at home moms (sahm) they are utomatically looked down on for not having big goals and aspirations. As if being home to raise your children is somehow a bad thing. If a woman says that she’s a nanny this is completely acceptable. She is out there in the “real world” making money for herself. If she is a teacher she is a hero for giving her life to the service of children. If she is a maid she is doing her best for her family.. and so on.

It doesn’t matter that her being out of the house working means that she and her husband now need to pay someone else to be a nanny, and a teacher, and quite possibly their own personal maid. The world has changed their idea of what is worthy. Instead of a great and worthy lifebeing what it always was, finding a partner to spend your life with, having children to live make sure that your legacy continues, and raising them to be pruductive members of society. Now a worthy life is making a lot of money and buying garbage you don’t need to prove that you can.

The point, the actual reason for a job is to support your family. That’s it. It’s to make sure that everyone in your family is well taken care of. Since the beginning of time people had to work to survive. Even before money was invented people had to work. This is something that is missed a lot in today’s society. Men usually worked outside by hunting, protecting, and building things. Women took care of the children, did the cooking, cleaning, and until the last couple hunded years the farming. That’s just since domesticated animals became a things and men can stay home and not have to be out in hunting teams all the time.

People grew and hunted or gathered food. People made clothes, and houses, and tools, and everything else one needs to survive. Most people did these things for their own personal use. Some cultures did these things collectively, and created a system of bartering that eventually turned into a money exchange because if someone spends 3 months building a bed and needs to exchange it for food and the only person who wants the bed has an apple farm it’ll take an awful lot of apples to pay for the bed… and then he has to trade apples for whatever else he wants. Money made the trading easier.

The reason that men traditionally “worked” is because the woman was taking care of the rest of the family. The most important part of society. What the man did for work was less important than how the mom raised her children. Now it’s reverse. Now both men and women are told they are nothing if they don’t work and having children is just a waste of time and money that could be spent on important things. Moms and dads are told that if they did make the mistake of having children it’s best to leave those children with others who aren’t as accomplished as they are to “deal with the kids” so the parents can concentrate on the important things.

Children are the most imporant things. Women who stay home do all the jobs of those who work only they don’t get paid… and they don’t have to pay out either. We need to stop telling women that they are useless if they don’t act like men, and start letting women go back to being the backbone of the family. Maybe then children will go back to being properly cared for by both a mom and a dad.

parenting

I have 5 maybe 8 years left

Katrina Russell

I am a homeschool mom. I am also a single mom. This puts a lot of constraints on my ability to work, and earn money.

I do my best with different avenues and am very thankful that I have friends that have owned their own businesses for years and I am able to both work for them when I can and get advice on running my own. I was an older mom, 37 when my son was born, and I was lucky enough to have help in the first couple of years, but by the time my son was ready to really start school I was on my own. Since then he and I have been a little team. Even when his father was alive and just not living with us he used to refer to us as such.

We have always been close. We have co-slept his whole life. When I make plans he is always included. Most of my friends and social activities revolve around his friends and their parents. I take him with me to most events that I attend. He is my little “plus one”.

There are people that think that all of this is “weird” and that I should, “have a life outside of him”, but here’s the thing. I did that. I was 37 when he was born. I lived lots of life. I did the allnighters out with coworkers and fellow students. I partied. I traveled. I lived that life. Now I want to live the life of a mom and have my family. If I told people that my family was my life, and that I spent all of my time with them, and thay my husband and I were taking our kids on all of the adventures that I take my son, no one would blink an eye. The fact that it’s just me and my son some how makes it weird.

People tell me that I need to get out and start dating. That I should create a life without him because what happens when he’s gone and I’m left all alone. But that’s exactly the point. My son is 10 year old. He’s not going to want to be with me all the time, and give me snuggles everyday for much longer.

Last night a group of us went skiing… well, the kids were skiing, the parents were hanging out drunking hot cocoa and chatting. My son was running about having a blast with his friends. We ran into my newphew while we were there and he was off on his own with his friends. My brother wasn’t even in the same town. My nephew is 14 now. He’s just a 3 years and 2 months older than my son. I know the days are coming that my son won’t need or want me around all the time. This is my time to spend with him.

I’ve never understood people who had kids just to pass them off to someone else. It seems counterentuative. I love my boy. He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me. I want this chapter of my life to be about him. I want him to look back on his childhood and remember that his mother was there for him. I want him to remember all the fun places we went to and adventures that we had. I want him to know that he wasn’t an afterthought to his mother. That when he was a boy his mother said no to things that she couldn’t bring him to so that she could spend as much time with him as possible. I want to enjoy my little one as long as he lets me.

In 5 years he will be 15 and he’ll have friends that are beginning to drive, and girls that he is interested in dating. I will be someone that he will check in with. I am hoping that I will be someone that he can come to for advice. Someone that he can trust. But I won’t be his teammember anymore. He’ll have knew people for that.

In 8 years he will be 18. An adult. He will be able to move out, get married, join the army, and may any other decisions that he chooses. I won’t be the center of his world, and that’s good. I’m not supposed to be then. I am supposed to be now.

parenting

When is it ok to quit?

Katrina Russell

My son started taking karate in the summer before pre-k, not because he had an interest in karate, but because his nursery teacher was concerned he wasn’t making friends and being home we me all summer would set him back even further. We had been enrolled in many other activities to get him socialized. Mommy and me gymnastics, library play group, and swim classes to name a few, but in all of them I was part of the activity. The teacher thought it important to get him into an activity that I wasn’t included, and this seemed a good fit.

The class started in a basic exercise class for 4-6 year old’s. The Sensei was great and he taught about self control on top of physical conditioning. My son made some friends and I made friends with one of the moms who’s son happened to go to school with my son. It was a great experience.

However, now the boys are almost 11 and neither of them have any real interest in the fighting aspect of karate. They both have a sweet nature and are must more likely to be playing hide and go seek at recess than joining most of the other boys for baseball or tag foot ball. My son loves music and chess and takes classes in both. He participates in the church choir and faith formation classes. Both boys also love to ski and, though not in the same school anymore, I take my son to the hill at the time of the school’s ski club so that he can see his old friends. I say all of this to both explain my son’s personality and to show that his socialization is not lacking.

So here is the question at hand. Both boys are in the class right before sparring, and both boys want nothing to with sparring. I keep thinking that he’s still only 10 and his testosterone hasn’t kicked in yet, that once that happens he’ll be more likely to want to get involved with more aggressive sports. My brother wanted nothing to do with sports as a kid and my father, who was a boxer in his youth, used to tease him by calling him “Sport Billy” (a cartoon character when we were little). Eventually, my brother went on to love wrestling and played football. Then as an adult he took Taekwondo. My nephew does a combination of the lot. I keep thinking that if I just push him to stay a little longer that he may grow into the sport.

I also feel like he made a commitment. He’s been taking this class for almost 7 year, though the first few were more about conditioning. He has been working towards his black belt. He has all the time and energy invested already…. and then I remember that he never asked to join this class. He never showed interest in karate itself. He enjoys being with his friends, and he loves the games they play, but unlike the conversation that we had about his music, chess, and skiing he never showed interest in the actual sport of karate.

So here I am. A mom with a dilemma… do I hold him to a responsibility he never agreed to just in case he decides he wants it in the future, or do I let it go and allow him to quit when it starts to get hard?

Joining Karate
parenting

There isn’t a little boy born who wouldn’t tear the world apart to save his mummy

Katrina Russell

It’s a quote from one of my old favorite shows, “Doctor Who”. Well, before it went stupid in the last few years. I had seen this episode before I had my son and thought it cute. Watching it now, as a mom of a son… it is so true.

There’s no act of love more pure than that of a little boy willing to do anything to save his mummy. Their bond is unbreakable and unconditional, and the strength of this bond has been evidenced time and time again. Even in the darkest moments, when the world seems to be against them, the powerful connection between mother and son will never break.

No matter the challenge, a little boy’s heart will always lead him to protect his mum without hesitation. When faced with danger, he will risk it all to keep her safe. He will go above and beyond, no matter the cost, to be there for her in her time of need. That’s the kind of love that only a mother and son could share.

No matter the age, a little boy will never forget the strength of the bond he has with his mum. He will remember it for years to come, and he will never forget the unconditional love that only his mum can give him. Even when tears fall down his cheeks, he won’t stop trying to save her. His courage will not waiver, and he’ll never give up, no matter the odds.

There isn’t a little boy born who wouldn’t tear the world apart to save his mummy. Their fearlessness and selflessness knows no bounds, and their bond will last an eternity. No matter the danger, the strength of a little boy’s love for his mummy will prevail.

This is one of the most important traits that a boy can have and that a mother can cultivate. Mothers love to “baby” their little boys, and keep them with them as much as possible, but this is not actually good for the boy himself. Boys have a natural instinct to protect their moms, their wives, and their children, and they should. In a world with fewer and fewer homes with men in them to help raise their children, moms have to understand the importance of raising little boys to be the men who will protect.

Today, especially in the West we think that everything should be peaceful and loving and safe. That “bad things” happen to “other people” and that as long as we put our kids in helmets and seatbelts and tell them that they are perfect just the way they are then those children will have perfect lives, but life isn’t perfect. Life isn’t safe, and it’s our jobs as moms to make our children as strong and capable as possible. Our little boys want to protect us, and it’s our job to let them.

Addiction, Love, Mental Health, parenting

The new “free” life is killing people

Katrina Russell

I don’t understand this new trope of young people who all talk about how much they hate the grind, how capitalism is evil and people are more than just money and wages and how life shouldn’t be wasted working… while at the same time they complain that they should be given more stuff without money, wages, or working.

At the same time they are saying that love and marriage is an outdated institution and way of life, that having children is akin to slavery and a product of white supremacy and the patriarchy and the only thing of any value is having fun and getting more free stuff. I mean if that isn’t materialism and narcissism then I don’t know what is.

I understood the time when people, especially men, were working 100 hours a week and killing themselves to “keep up with the Jones’s”. The cliche was that on their death bed that they wouldn’t be thinking about the deals they didn’t make, or the car they never bought, but the time they missed with their family and their loved ones. Now it seems that love is the bad kind of 4 letter word. As if having someone to love is somehow a detriment to your own freedom and happiness.

Everyday on social media there are posts, especially from women about how they aren’t going to succumb to the old patriarchal regime of being a mom and putting their needs on the backburner for someone else. They aren’t going to give up their girls night out and their shoe collection for some crying, drooling brat, as if A. kids have no worth in and of themselves more than shoes, and B. Kids never grow out of the infant stage and won’t be there to take care of their parents’ crying, drooling asses one day.

The Western world has become consumed with being as “free and happy” as possible without any responsibility, or anything getting in their way, and yet the Western world has become fraught with mental illness, drug addiction, and violence. People are more miserable today in a world of ease than ever before. In fact people are looking for things to be angry about instead of just enjoying what they have… mostly because people don’t have anything worth having. They don’t know what it’s like to earn something tangible, never mind what it’s like to earn respect.

People think that relationships are about everything the other person can give or do for you. It’s about making sure that you never feel the slightest bit uncomfortable. Life is about the fastest way to get a dopamine hit, whether through drugs themselves or through constant social media yes men telling you how amazing you are. If a relationship hits a snag and the other person doesn’t want to do the same thing that you want then they are holding you back and quite possibly abusing you. If a child comes along then they are a threat to your very way of life and must be killed immediately before it gets a chance to be seen.

People have been turned into a group of individuals that hate people, not just others, but themselves as well. They think that any kind of work is oppressive, as if the things that they want just appear out of no where and someone else doesn’t have to work to make them. They think that they are the star of the show and anyone who disagrees with them is the antagonist in their story and must be destroyed. People today would rather live in a computer than talk to their neighbors…. and the overdose and suicide rates show that this new life view is killing them.

grief, Love, Mental Health, parenting, Prayer

Why I choose to believe

Katrina Russell

Let me start by saying that I only converted to Catholicism 8 years ago, and even then it was more of a tradition than anything else. My grandmother was born from Irish immigrants, and for those who don’t know, they are wicked Catholic…. at least the good ones are. My grandfather was Protestant, but he went out for cigarettes when my dad was a kid and I never met him.

My dad was raised in Catholic school, so he hated religion, nuns, rulers…. discipline… pretty much everything about it. My mom was one of those Protestants that I had mentioned and she went bonkers after I was born. I’m not saying that to be hyperbolic, she was actually diagnosed with schizophrenia. She talked a lot about God and how God used to tell her things, so my relationship with God was a little strained as a child.

My father did understand the importance of the Bible and its teaching. He understood its place in our society and the laws, rules and ethics that it taught. He didn’t talk to me about religion per say, but he read to me from the children’s’ Bible when I was small. I mostly have memories of snuggling on the couch with him and not understanding why Joseph’s brothers were so horrible. This was a very important memory to me though because in general my father didn’t read to me, so the fact that he took the time to do that with this book meant it must have been important.

I didn’t judge people who were religious. In fact my dad used to encourage me to check out different religions and see if any of them fit. I understood that my problems with religion itself had more to do with my mother and her psychosis than the religion itself, but for a long time people who talked about Jesus really freaked me out. When it was time to baptize my son I knew that I wanted him to be Catholic like my grandmother, who had passed away at that point. I had been baptized myself as a baby, but never any other formal religious teaching.

When I thought about which school in my area that I wanted my son to go to; I knew that I didn’t want him to go to the local public school where some of my friends taught and complained about how dangerous it was. I knew that I wanted him to go to the local Catholic school. Again, at this point religion was just background. As a person who studied history in college and has a general obsession with it and archeology (I blame Indiana Jones) I spent a lot of time watching documentaries and reading things about the history of the Bible and the archeological proof that has been discovered that backed up many of the stories. In general I was always fascinated by the time period, but never put a lot of effort in learning about the text itself. God was more of an idea from the past that helped other people, but didn’t really seem needed today.

Then my dad died, and I felt comfort in the fact that there was an afterlife and that I would see him again one day. Then his long-term girlfriend died, and I was glad that at least they were together. Then my dog died, and I thought that he could keep them company for the decades that it would be until we would reunite. Don’t get me wrong, I was devastated, but knowing that God is out there, knowing that my dad could look down on us and see my son and the wonderful little boy that he was becoming made that horrible year more bearable.

The following year my son started at the Catholic school and I became heavily involved. I volunteered whenever I could, and decided that if he was going there it would be best if we went to church on Sunday, especially the church that was attached to the school. I realized how much I wanted my son to have faith. I wanted him to feel comforted as much as I do.

This was 7 years ago. My son is now 10 and we still attend church every Sunday. He belongs to the choir, I teach a CCD class, and he attends his own. He has gotten his 1st communion, and we volunteer when we can. I love joining the Bible study classes. Our faith has become a huge part of our life. I don’t have a lot of time to read, but I listen to the Bible on Audible, and I love listening to commentary from all kinds of people about how they interpret The Word, and the stories being portrayed.

I have begun to realize how amazing The Bible actually is. How much was wisdom was articulated in that book that people today are still figuring out. Knowing that this book came from a time when a lot of people thought the sun traveled around the earth by a man pulling a chariot. This book talks about how everyone is created in Gods image and therefore just as important as anyone else. It talks about how, even though slavery is a norm at this time for many reasons, slaves must still be treated as fellow humans and given all the rights thereof. It talks about how children should honor their fathers as much as their mothers and how parents don’t have the right to kill their children even id they have done something wrong. It talks about how to live a successful life in any time.

The Israelites, or Jews as they are known today, have been laughed at, persecuted, and blamed for all the wrongs of the world, because, it seems no matter what wrong happens in the world they still manage to thrive. People think this is because they are “obviously stealing from everyone else” when in reality it is because they are working hard and taking care of each other as the Bible told them to.

A lot of Christians today want to discount the Old Testament, which I don’t understand. They seem to forget that Jesus was Jewish and specifically said that he was there in accordance with the law. In Matthew he said…

17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfill.

18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

There are a lot of people today who hate the fact that God asks things of us. They hate the fact that God lets bad things happen to us. They feel that God should be there personal valet and should be there to do their bidding, and that is the only way that God can prove himself.

I know so many people who either don’t believe or they hate God because bad things have happened to them, or because bad things happen in general. I know so many people who think they are getting punished by God because they haven’t been following His laws and their life is not the way they wish it to be. I know so many people who think that they have screwed up too much that God could never forgive them. My response is to that is that God is Our Father who art in Heaven. As our father He gives us His rules. He lets us know the best way to live a good life, and the things that we should concentrate on to get said life. What He doesn’t do is prevent us from experiencing our consequences.

Maybe I understand this because I was raised by a single dad. I didn’t have the mom around to coddle me, and protect me from myself. If I chose to climb a tree too high and fell out I was also the one who had an ice pack on my ankle later. If I chose to ran through the woods for the umpteenth time in shorts that summer then I was the one sitting out of the pool covered in pink stuff while still itching. My dad told me not to do things. He told me how to behave, but ultimately it was my decision and I had to deal with it. Occasionally he would see that I got in over my head and help me out, but that was few and far between.

The one thing he always did, no matter how much my brother and I screwed up. The one thing I never had to worry about, was that he loved us. He forgave us, and he gave us the opportunity to make better choices in the future. The reason that I believe in God is because I believed in my father. I believed in a relationship that is so much stronger than one could imagine. Now that I am a mother I know how much I love my son. I know that there is nothing he could do to make me not love him, but knowing that his father died of a drug overdose, I know that sometimes the ones you love can make choices that aren’t safe, and aren’t good to be around.

The reason that I believe in God is because God made us in His image. God made us knowing that we would screw up, and that life would be hard sometimes, but God made us because He knew that it would be worth it in the end. Just like my dad made me and just like I made my son. So many people today don’t want to have children because its expensive, or climate change, or some other material issue…. but for those of us who believe in God and know how much bigger life really is. We know that God made us, because it’s worth it. Love always is.

cancel culture, free speech, Homeless, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

School Choice is about the Parent’s choice not the Government’s choice.

Katrina Russell

I belong to so many Facebook groups it’s ridiculous. As a homeschool mom I like keeping in touch with other homeschool parents to see what kinds of curriculum they use, what kinds of activities they have coming up, and of course it’s a great way to keep up on rules and laws in the area.

I only started homeschooling my son last year, but I have been teaching homeschoolers on-line for a few years. I started right before Covid and have seen homeschooling explode since then. The more that I talk with people the more I see how many different reasons people have for choosing homeschool. Some people have had problems with their local public schools. Some people choose to include more religious teaching in their schooling. Some just live in communities that don’t have the best schools. And of course there are those who just feel that between school shootings and Covid schools are safer. Some just want to spend their children’s childhood with their children instead of sending them off for 7 hours a day.

Regardless of the reason for choosing homeschooling they are all happy that they had that choice. Which is why I think it’s so hypocritical that so many homeschool moms are against school choice. They literally made the choice to take their kids out of the public schools for whatever reason and now they want to make sure that other’s don’t have the same opportunity.

A lot of these moms use the excuse that they don’t want the government involved in their kids schooling and that places like California who passed their version of school choice now has the government all up in the business of homeschoolers. That is just BS. California also has homeless people crapping on people’s front doorsteps and shoplifting is no longer a crime. Just because one state is crazy doesn’t mean that every other state needs to be punished. This is the whole purpose of Federalism.

School Choice, real School Choice is about getting the government out of the decisions made about the schools. It’s about a family deciding that the government school is garbage and they want to take the tax dollars attached to the child and putting it towards whichever kind of education the family chooses. Maybe it’s a different town, maybe it’s a private or Charter school, maybe it’s a religious school, or maybe it’s homeschooling. The government doesn’t get a say in the education of the children just because they collect the money from the tax payers.

I don’t know when the American people started to think that the government was in charge. They literally work for us. We elect them. We pay them. They are put into office to safeguard against people who try to take away our rights and to enact new laws that coincide with what the citizens in the area need or want in their communities. Somehow people now think that the government is the boss of the people, and put in office to tell us what to do.

We need to stop telling each other that we can’t have things because the government will stop us. We have to start telling the government that they can’t have things or we will stop them. Our kids are just that… OURS. They are not for the government to raise. They are not for the government to control. Their education is our responsibility and if we CHOOSE to take the money that the community allotted to our kids and spend it on curriculum that we approve of the government just has to hand us a check and say, “you’re welcome”. Or they can find themselves recalled and we’ll find people who do listen to We The People.

cancel culture, free speech, parenting, Politics

Have you lost friends to politics?

Katrina Russell

OK, be honest, have you lost any friends or family members to politics in the last few years? This seems to be more and more a common occurrence. People are incapable of disagreement anymore. They can’t have differing opinions. They can’t have their opinions challenged. They just want to live in a bubble of their own making.

Before the internet people formed their opinions about life primarily from their surroundings. Their family, friends, schools, churches, and whomever else they spent their time with. Now people get their information from invisible entities behind a keyboard. Everyone plugs into the same mainstream media and downloads the same information into their brains without ever questioning who is giving them the information or if it makes sense. They just listen and obey and are told that anyone who disagrees with the mainstream narrative is the enemy.

Thinking for yourself or doing your own research is now considered evil. You are a racist, sexist Nazi if you read something that is not put out by the media which supports one leg of the government while at the same time being convinced the government itself is also evil because there are people in the government who don’t agree with the media. It’s a cycle of ignorance being camouflaged as information.

The best way to tell that something is probably wrong is if no one is allowed to question it. Facts and people who are correct have no problem being questioned because they have the answers and understand how to communicate their point. People who are brainwashed are trained to shut down and turn away from anything that is contrary because those in charge know how flimsy their ideas are and how easily they can be turned over. If you are being told by the people giving you information that questions are not allowed… that is a major red flag.

I have lost family and friends to this ideology, and the saddest part is that they can’t even understand they are being manipulated. My brother and I have never been on the same page politically. We have always had debates and talked about the reality of topics. We both agree on the facts, but just have differing opinions about what should be done about these facts. For instance I am pro-life and he is pro-choice. We both understand that the baby is a baby. We both understand that an abortion kills the baby. We both agree that we would never want our babies to be aborted. He just doesn’t care if other people’s babies are. He doesn’t like most people in general and doesn’t care if their are fewer of them. He thinks we should be able to abort adults if they aren’t contributing to society. I guess he thinks similarly to the Canadians view with “assisted suicide”. That yes, there is a life, but no, the life doesn’t matter. I’m opposed to abortion and assisted suicide and think that all lives matter. We agree to disagree. Facts are facts and we’re allowed to have different opinions on how they are handled.

On the other hand I have 2 Goddaughters who I helped raise. They have 2 cousins that I have known since the say they were born. I have a cousin that I was always there for and even babysat over the years when we were little. All of whom disagree with my opinions on things. I don’t really know which parts, because they don’t talk to me about any of them. They just stopped talking to me. No explanation , no discussion… just nothing.

I’m the same person that was there for them their entire lives. I’m the same person that they know is not racist, sexist, homophobic or a Nazi, but they can’t handle that I have a different opinion than what the screen tells them to believe. They can’t handle that I bring up facts that they haven’t heard. In fact, one of them told me that facts were racist. She’s also a person who has a Master’s Degree, which confuses me because if facts are racist how did she get a degree? Were there no facts in her classes that she had to learn to pass?

There is a whole group of people out there that literally can’t handle information that goes against the grain. They can’t handle critical thinking. They would rather reject and hate people who love them and have been there for them their whole life than admit they may not understand something or may have gotten something wrong, or, in the case of my brother and me, that they are allowed to have different opinions about. And I feel bad for them, because they will never grow as people and will never have real connections in life without being able to think for themselves.

Addiction, Love, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

No one can do everything, and we need to stop telling people that they can.

Katrina Russell

We have to stop telling children, especially little girls, that they can do everything themselves. No one can. We used to understand this. We used to understand the importance of family and marriage and partners, but somewhere along the lines people, and especially girls started being told that they can do everything. That they don’t need anyone else. That, “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle”, as Irina Dunn coined.

In reality everyone needs people. The family unit was set up as a way of complementing each other’s strengths and working together. It’s easier to share responsibilities than trying to do them all by yourself. This seems like commonsense, but somewhere along the line ego got in the way and suddenly “I can do it myself” became the motto.

This is not to say that there are things that women or men can’t do. Of course most people are capable of anything that they put their minds too, but they can’t do everything. There are only so many hours in a day. There is only so much energy to be expended. Eventually you run out and the person told that they can do everything feels like a failure when they can’t.

Telling someone that they can do everything is similar to telling a child that they can have everything that they want in a store. Say you have $300 and you take a child to Target. You can tell them that they can have anything that they want, they just have to choose. Maybe they pick a giant Lego set, and have $100 left to spend and you tell them, “oh that’s great, why don’t you add a book and a game on top of that”. You leave the store and the child is ecstatic.

Now say you have the same child and the same $300 and you go into Target and tell them they can have everything that they want. Now the kid is loading up cart after cart of everything they could possibly desire in the slightest. You head to the register and start piling things out. Then you tell the cashier to stop when they reach $300. The child is confused. They don’t even know what they got. Maybe the thing they really wanted hasn’t even been taken out of the carriage yet. Now the child is devastated and let down. It’s “The worst birthday ever!” even though they got $300 worth of things they kind of wanted.

This is how we treat people, and especially women today. We tell them to go for everything they want. They go to school, they change majors a few times, they date around a bit, they start to work on a career, and everything seems good. They are getting everything they want. Now they’re 35, and single and thinking, “next on my list: husband and kids”. They look around and all the guys are kind of jerks, or giant children because they have also been told that they can have whatever they want and they just spent the last 20 years getting all the hook ups they could ask for without having to put anything into the relationship or grow up at all. Why should they? The women can handle everything.

Now the woman is like, “ok, clock ticking. I want kids, but I need a man for that. I also want to be able to raise my kids myself and not send them off with the nanny.” The world says, “ok, just find a guy and get started”. But those guys were left in the carriage when you ran out of money and some other girl who knew what she wanted came along and bought him already. The woman is left with what ever was the easiest to throw up on the register first and didn’t actually get a chance to choose.

I know, you’re going to say, “Not all women want to get married. Not all women want kids”. That is true, but most do, and all at least want the opportunity to decide for themselves and not just get left with whatever was in the first carriage.

Instead of telling kids that they can do everything we need to tell them that they can do anything that they choose, and then teach them how to make good choices. Otherwise we’re going to have more and more generations of self medicating, drug addicted, miserable people who think the idea of abortion and government sponsored suicide are great ideas, because, “this is the worst life ever” when you don’t understand how to get what you really want.

cancel culture, free speech, Healthcare, Mental Health, parenting

When did victimhood become a goal?

Katrina Russell

Have you been on social media lately? If you haven’t, good on you, stay off. If you have you have probably seen the new trend of young people proudly exclaiming their mental illnesses. Everything from depression to turrets to being a furry is a new “identity”. Everyone has AHDH. Everyone is on the spectrum. Everyone has some sort of depression or anxiety issue.

The crazy thing (no pun intended) is that these people aren’t talking about the struggles that they have and how they overcome these problems with hard work and patience. They are not reaching out for help, or giving advice or inspiration to other’s on how they too can better themselves under these conditions. They are literally telling other people that they have to change their behavior to comply to the mental illness.

People have stopped trying to take responsibility for their actions. People are no longer looking to find ways to contribute to society despite whatever shortcomings or obstacles are in their way. These people are actually telling everyone else in society that problems are the most important thing about a person and that if you don’t have a major mental illness or a major tragedy in your history then you have no rights at all.

If you are a person who has a mental illness or tragedy in your life and have worked hard to overcome, and have made something of yourself then you are an even worse person than the person that never had any problems to begin with. It’s like you are a traitor because you managed to better yourself and being a regular society contributing person is the same as being a Nazi or a KKK member. It’s somehow hateful to those with disabilities or some kind of troubled past.

Victimhood is the new super power. Instead of Captain America or Superman the new heroes are people who medicate themselves into oblivion and yell at anyone who dares live their life without catering to the every whim of self declared victimhood. It’s sick, and we need to stop placating them because it isn’t good for them, and it isn’t good for society, and it sure as Hell isn’t good for the future.