Month: January 2022

Healthcare, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

When did society start being ok with sexualizing kids?

Katrina Russell

We all remember “The Talk” when we were little. The embarrassing conversation with a parent about “the birds and the bees”. Some of us remember the day in grade school when all the boys when outside to play and all of the girls got the video about how our bodies were changing and what to expect when our monthly cycle started. Quite a few of us remember Sex Ed classes in school. It was all very clinical, basically a biology class. This is how the reproductive system works. These are different kinds of birth control available. These are some common STDs that you want to avoid by using said birth control. That’s it. Maybe there was the occasional progressive teacher that would bring out the banana and the condom, but I really think that was more an urban legend.

This type of sex talk is completely understandable. Children and teenagers need to understand the science of how bodies function. No problem. I have an 8-year-old. I have been updating him on new information about bodily functions at appropriate times. He has a penis. Girls have a vagina. Girls get their period once a month. Girls have the “house the baby lives in in their bellies” aka womb. I remember being at Disney a few months back and having to bring him into the ladies’ room because I wasn’t sending him off by himself and there were no family rooms available. He looked around all confused and whispered in my ear, “Do little girls have vaginas too?”. They do… for those who aren’t aware.

The point is, I’m very open about biology with my kid. He understands the difference between male bodies and female bodies. We’ve talked about all kinds of bodily functions as pertains to science. I’ve taught him about privacy and keeping certain body parts to himself. When he discovered that touching himself felt good. I just said, “yes it does, but you do that in private.” I didn’t hide facts. i didn’t shame him. I didn’t shelter him from discovering things on his own about his own body.

I didn’t, however, give him a book or movie about masturbating and start teaching him about different sexual positions and kink. None of these things are appropriate for children. I don’t know when this became a political issue. This used to be something everyone agreed to. Whether it was the Christian Right or the Tipper Gore Left making sure there were advisory stickers on Rap music. Children were to be protected from adult content.

We as a society used to understand that kids shouldn’t go into a rate R movie, never mind rated X, and yet somewhere along the line people stopped understanding this. It changed to, “oh, they can see worse on the internet… who cares?”. Well, I for one care. Many people care. Many people SHOULD care.

There have been calls to ban explicit adult content books from school libraries and half the country thinks this is censorship. Censorship to keep porn out of the hands of children. Children are to be taken to Gay Pride events and celebrated for watching adults perform kink in the streets. Sexual identity and expression should be taught to kindergarteners. Most children have no idea what any of that means.

I live in Massachusetts. I have many openly gay friends and family members. I have never hidden this fact from my son. He has spent time with my friends who are gay. When he was a toddler and first started getting into Doctor Who and Captain Jack Harkness was an openly OPEN character played by an openly gay man, I would show him videos on Insta of “Jack and his husband”. When my son was watching “The Simpsons” and Homer befriended a gay man and Marge was trying to hint to Homer about the friend being gay my son was confused why anyone would care.

My son does not know one thing about sex. My son knows that people love each other and want to kiss each other. That’s it. He knows that “love” makes a baby. My son is so unaware of how sex works that after his father died, he asked if you love someone in Heaven can you still make a baby. That’s sweet. That’s innocent. That’s how children should be.

In a world full of Epsteins and Clintons you would think that parents would be working overtime at keeping sex away from their kids. In a world in which teachers and religious leaders and sports coaches, and all the other trusted people who we send our kids off to are known to be the biggest predators, you would think that parents would work extra hard at making sure these same people aren’t sexualizing your kids while telling you “It’s no big deal.”

Anyone who thinks that Elementary or Middle School kids should not only have access but be given highly sexual material are people you shouldn’t want anywhere near your kids. If you think otherwise you may want to ask yourself why.

people wearing diy masks
Addiction, bullying, grief, Healthcare, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

Death Happens

Katrina Russell

I don’t know what has been going on in the last couple years that suddenly we can’t go back to normal until all death has been stopped. Well, all covid deaths. They are willing to let kids kill themselves, and overdose on drugs. They are willing to take dying people off of transplant lists if they don’t conform to their politics, because none of that matters except stopping anyone from ever dying of Covid-19 again. We need to stop death itself… in the case of Covid-19 anyway.

The problem is no one can stop death. The more we try the worse it gets. People are becoming obsessed with death. With Covid death specifically. People have locked themselves in their house. They refuse to see family and friends. They won’t work. They won’t go outside in the fresh air for fear it may be contaminated.

Obesity is the number one killer in this country (the US), and yet because of lockdowns weight gain has been skyrocketing. Everyone is so afraid of catching Covid they are making themselves more vulnerable to it. And let’s be honest, when it comes to weight gain Covid is the least of people’s problems. With everyone so obsessed with controlling “The Spread” people have paid no attention to the real killers in this country. Heart Disease, Cancer, and Diabetes are still high on the list.

People are so fearful to live they are missing out on life. When I talk to others about it they say that I can’t possibly understand because I don’t have anyone in my life to worry about. I’ve already lost them all. My grams, and father’s s/o died of Alzheimer’s, my dad died of Diabetes, my mom died of pneumonia, and my son’s father died of a drug overdose. They are right. I’m not scared of a virus. I’m not scared of a cold. I know that life is short, and anything can take anyone at any time.

When my loved ones died, I didn’t fight for the government to make us wear masks so no one would get pneumonia. I didn’t fight for the government to impose restrictions on sugary foods and mandate exercise to prevent Diabetes. I didn’t fight for the government to not allow anyone treatment if they made choices that the government disagreed with. My father ended up with type 1 diabetes, it wasn’t all personal choices, but he still could have taken care of it better. My son’s father was an addict… that’s all lifestyle. Yet the same people saying that no one who doesn’t choose vaccination should be treated, because it’s they’re fault… yet, most heart disease, diabetes, cancer, and certainly addiction is, if not caused, compounded by personal choices. No one would expect the government to not treat or lock down or not give passports to be in society to those with these lifestyle diseases. Don’t even get me started on STDs.

We are never going to stop death. We are never going to save everyone. We are never going to fix the world. The best we can do is live in it, and that starts by opening our doors, taking off the damn masks, and seeing each other again. Before we all die of old age.

pexels-photo-374918.jpeg
bullying, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

It’s ok to be wrong

Katrina Russell

I have been told my whole life that I can’t admit to being wrong. Yet, I admit I’m wrong all the time. In fact, the same people who tell me that I can’t admit to being wrong are always making the joke of, “let me mark the calendar” or “let me get this is writing” or “let me record this”… yet, they ALWAY make this joke because I admit I’m wrong all the time.

They have confused not admitting that I’m wrong with not caving when I know that I’m right. A classic example of this is when I went to get ice cream with one of these friends. I was ordering my usual, baby peppermint stick with jimmies (chocolate sprinkles for those not in Boston). The order came to $3.10. My friend then ordered a baby peppermint stick. She had $3.00 on her and asked if I had $.10 to borrow. I told her that I had it, but that she shouldn’t need it as she didn’t get any jimmies. She responded that didn’t matter. That jimmies were free. I said that I was always charged jimmies before, but that this particular ice cream stand was a place that she frequented more than I did so maybe they didn’t charge. I got out a quarter to cover her. The ice cream kid then came back and charged her $2.80. For those who aren’t good at math, that’s less. $.30 less to be precise… which I have to say is a lot of jimmies, but alas. She then turned to me angrily saying, “You always have to be right!”.

This, I find, is the difference between someone who always has to be right and someone who is just stubborn. I will own stubborn all day long. I have my thoughts, opinions, and knowledge and I stand by them, but I don’t always have to be right. I am more than willing to change my mind when new evidence is presented.

I have spent a lot of my life in school and/or taking classes. I read constantly. I watch videos on the internet, now that it’s a thing. I love to learn new things. I am constantly getting information that I hadn’t previously had. When I enter into a conversation, I know what I know and am willing to listen to the other person to see if they have anything to offer that may change my opinion. As with the ice cream shop, I was willing to contend that I was not as familiar with that particular store and therefore may not have knowledge about their practices that my friend had.

I think I get this from my upbringing. My brother is very different than me, and therefore thinks and interacts with things very different than me. We often have conversations about subjects that I know a little about and then he informs me of things that I was never made aware of, and it shifts my perspective, and vice versa. He had no idea that babies lost all their baby teeth, even after having my son. He didn’t believe me and had to Google it… I was right… I like being right… but I don’t HAVE to be, and therein lies the difference.

Lately people have been very divided on many issues. So divided that they are not even willing to listen to the other side. Anyone who disagrees with them is just labeled either stupid or evil. The problem is that everything in life has many parts, and many layers, and no one is always right, and no one is always wrong. The best way to get to the truth is to talk with people whom you disagree and actually listen to the other side. No one wants to do this anymore.

People are now intrinsically tied to their beliefs. It has become their identity. If you dare to disagree with someone it’s as if you are degrading the person’s actual self. It is no longer about facts and information it’s about how you feel about a situation that matters. By stating facts that disagree with someone’s feelings the person feels as if the fact spouter is destroying the person that they are, instead of just an idea that can be modified.

People are downright terrified to be wrong. To have their beliefs and therefore their reality and life questioned is the same as killing them. So, it’s been termed that words are violence. If you say words that go against anything that I believe you are now trying to destroy my reality and in turn kill me. No one can be wrong. No one can be mistaken. No one can be misinformed. Everyone has to follow the same way of thought, or they are the enemy.

The thing is facts are facts. My friend who believed that there was no cost for jimmies wasn’t right just because she thought it. Had it been reversed, and she was the one to order the jimmies and therefore charged extra she still would have had to pay it no matter her belief on the matter.

It’s ok to be wrong. Everyone is wrong all the time. It is not about you. The next time you find yourself pushing back. Insulting someone or hating someone because they have information that doesn’t match your beliefs trying talking with them. Maybe you have information that they don’t, and you may change their minds… or maybe you’re just wrong. Either way you will walk away stronger, and more informed and that’s what life is about.

boy wearing green crew neck shirt jumping from black stone on seashore
bullying, Love, parenting, Politics

Boys will be Boys

Katrina Russell

When did being a boy become toxic? People are literally outraged by kids’ t-shirts that say, “Boys will be Boys”. I would say that I don’t know what they want them to be, but we all know that’s not true. They want little boys to be anything but boys.

When did just being a boy become harmful and worthy of condemnation? Here’s the thing, boys will be boys. That’s what they are. They can’t help being a boy any more than a girl can help being a girl. Somehow saying that a boy being a boy has been conflated with being violent for violence’s sake, with rape, with just blatant hostility. Honestly if this is the only kind of boy you know you need to make new friends.

Boys are boys. They roughhouse, they break things in their attempts to try something new, they dig at each other, they even fight… they are way more active than girls and have a hard time sitting still. Boys will be boys because boys are boys.

Boys are more than twice as likely to be diagnosed and medicated for ADHD because they have trouble sitting and listening in school. I know this is surprising to everyone who has ever been to school, but school is boring. It just is. It doesn’t have to be, but that’s how it has been designed. It’s designed to create cogs who don’t question authority and can be put at a machine for long hours without break. That’s it.

Boys aren’t designed for that. Boys are designed to slay dragons. If you want to judge a boy’s attention span don’t sit him in a classroom listening to someone drone on; put him in front of his favorite video game, or his favorite adventure series/comic book, let him play a sport. He probably knows every stat of his favorite team, but yeah that poem he read in English class drifted right out of his head.

Boys and girls are different. That’s just a fact. Funny enough, the same people who hate the “Boys will be Boys” t-shirt are the same people saying there is nothing different between a boy and a girl that society doesn’t teach them. Yet, societies are different all over the world. Societies in Europe are different than those in America, those in America are different from those in Asia, those in Asia are different from those in Africa… they are even different amongst themselves, but the one thing that is never different is that boys, and men are the risk takers. They are, for the most point, the leaders, the warriors, the prisoners. The ones that risk it all for what they desire. The women have been the diplomats, the care takers, the mothers. No one assigned these roles all over the world, they are the roles people chose over and over. Men slay the dragon; women hold down the fort.

The exception to the rule proves the rule has never been clearer than in male/female relations. Women and men choose their roles. There have been plenty of women in positions of power. There have been Queens, and Prime Ministers, and Scientists, and Military Leaders… all of this is true. All of this shows that men are willing to follow women who prove themselves to be worthy of the position. Women who are willing to fight just as hard and as smart as they are. Men choose or (in the case of Queens) resign themselves to follow women all the time. There are countless women who have ruled over men since recorded time and have been quite successful. Society didn’t stop them.

The difference between men and women is that men, in general, want to rule. They want to prove themselves. They desire the power. Women want comfort. They want to know that they and their children are safe. The best way to do that is to find the most powerful man they can and let him protect her. That is a girl being a girl. And when men are looking for the right women, they are looking for the most compassionate they can find in order to know that they will be good to their children. It’s actual biological evolution at work.

Again, the same people who hate men, who think men and women are the same except for how society trains them are the same people who believe that evolution is the only answer to humankind… and yet, when told that evolution is what created society, they scoff… and blame men.

I feel bad for the woman who hates men. In a way they have been trained to hate themselves. They see themselves as less than because of the man’s power instead of equal but different.

I have a son. He’s only 8, and he is the sweetest boy you could meet. He also comes home with random holes in his clothes, and the list of nurse visits at his school is extensive. He was hesitant about continuing in his Karate class because they had to start punching and kicking, yet he’s been known to lay out a bully when required.

The thing about men is that they are complicated. Some women just see them as Neanderthals that never evolved, but the thing about boys is that they are like puppies. If you treat them well and love them, you will have a cuddly protector. If you don’t, they grow up to be the feral beast you expected. Men have the power and strength to drop any woman at any time… but they don’t. That is the mark of a real man, and why letting boys be boys is the best way to make sure they become real men.

woman in black shirt holding red lipstick
bullying, Politics

Everything is Sexist

Katrina Russell

I was born in the mid 70s. I was raised in the 80s, right in the heart of Feminism. When women were all about pant suits and shoulder pads. Every girl knew the words to “Working 9-5”. We were taught from a young age that we could do anything that a boy could do and not to take any flack just because we were girls.

Today women make up 60% of college students. Women make more money than men on average in their 20s. Approximately 25% of Congress, 18% of Governors, and 25% of Mayors are Women, and of course we have our first female Vice President. There are lists of the Top Ten Female CEOs in the World, not to mention all the everyday female owned and operated female companies. Women are doing what women have been fighting for over a century to do. They are ruling… and yet it’s not enough.

Women have women only gyms, and women only clubs, but if a men decide they want to have a men’s only area it’s sexism. Women can sleep around, and play games and they are Queens. If men do it, they’re users. Women have multiple baby daddies and live off the system so they don’t have to work, and it’s all good. Women can sleep around, get pregnant, and decide it’s fine to just kill the baby and people cheer for her. If men say they don’t feel ready to have a kid, they are dead beats.

Women in America today have no idea what oppression is. They think it’s someone calling them “Sweetie”. They think it’s a guy looking when they wear a low-cut shirt. You wore the shirt, expect the looks. No, you should never be touched without permission, but looks… when you’re flaunting it. Get over it. Women in America today should read about women in other countries. If you want to be a REAL Women’s Activist stop complaining that men want to have “safe spaces” where they can talk to each other too, and start looking into child brides, and women being killed for the crime of being raped.

This new feminist wave loves to feel better than because they point out that staying home and having babies (a thing most women actually WANT to do) is a sign of the Patriarchy. No, it’s a sign of existence. Having babies is literally the only way existence continues, and here’s the thing. Once most women have babies, a lot of them would much rather stay home with them than go back to work. That’s the reason why the pay gap changes between men and women in their 30s. Women have babies. They take time off to have them. They take time off to raise them. They switch careers to have a more flexible schedule to stay with them. They do all of this, because they want to. Because they choose to. Because they love their babies. They don’t love the boardroom.

This is a fundamental difference between men and women. Sure, SOME women would choose a career over babies, just as SOME men would choose staying home with the babies over a career, but it’s not the norm. And yes, there is a norm. There are choices and ways of thinking that are more female and more male. It’s the reason that gender roles were created in the first place. Yes, they were a social design. Generation after generation men wanted to go out and fight, and work, and provide for their families, and women wanted to stay home and take care of their babies. This is why in a majority of cultures this is the norm. This wasn’t put upon people by White Anglo-Saxon Men. This same phenomenon happened in Asian countries, and African countries, and Middle Eastern countries, and the tribes that came over from Asian countries to eventually be called Native Americans. The same “Societal Creations” happened regardless of which society, because it’s also biological.

So, today, when you are looking for a feminist fight, don’t look at the guy sitting next to you in the cubical who held the door for you. Look to the countries and cultures that are still raping and selling women if you want to fight for your fellow woman. Unless you just want the big strong men to keep going to war for you.

man holding us flag
Healthcare, Homeless, Love, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

The American Dream

Katrina Russell

The ideal that we are all free to make our own choices and create our own future. The ideal that if someone works hard and makes good choices, they can accomplish anything that they can dream. The United States was founded on this model. For two hundred years millions of people have left their homelands in search of this endeavor. Over a million people per year are still clamoring to get in, some legally, some not, all striving for a better life than the one they left behind.

The American Dream is alive and well all over the world… except in half of Americans. The problem with the dream is the part that it’s about freedom, and choices, and hard work. Half of America was raised to believe that the American Dream was that everything was to be taken care of FOR them… not by them. Half of Americans don’t feel that people should have to work hard or accomplish anything. They feel that simply being an American should automatically give them privileges.

Half of America thinks that working is for “other people”… for “rich people”. As long as the rich have money why should anyone else have to work. The rich should just pay for everyone else. The fact that they are expected to pay back loans that they signed for in order to further their own education, or possibly have to give up on some luxuries in order to afford necessities is a form of slavery.

People love to compare the cost of housing between when “Boomers” were buying compared to now is seriously laughable. The biggest just in the market was between 1970s-1990s, when it increased by 700%, and was when the Boomers were buying. It had more to do with the tech boom and an economy that was suddenly international and an entire way of life changing than being mean to the next generation. From the 90s to today housing costs have only gone up about 100%, which is a lot less.

Of course, the same people who cry about not being able to afford housing on a single income are the same people crying about how people shouldn’t get married and that women have to work and never stay home with the kids… even though they really don’t think anyone should have to work and hate work… women should be forced to have to work because it’s men who kept them down by not letting them do the thing that everyone hates to do.

These same people are also the ones who get an upgrade on a $1000 telephone every year. Not to mention TVs, gaming systems, tablets, computers…. and on and on. Do you know what Boomers spent on Telephones and TVs? Around $20 and $160 respectively, and seeing as the average household income was about $8300 they were quite expensive. People had to save up for them… and then… that was it. They had the same phone and TV for decades. They didn’t “upgrade”, they didn’t have 30 different streaming services. They had rabbit ears, tin foil, and their youngest child to help get the one channel of the 3-5 they were trying to watch.

One way that people try to explain the unfairness is by saying that the increase in minimum wage hasn’t changed much. Which is true in some regards. The federal minimum wage in 1970 was $1.60 the current federal minimum wage is $7.25, therefore minimum wage is up 450%, which is a lot, but the most important thing is that hardly anyone makes the federal minimum wage. Each state has their own minimum wage, and most people don’t even make that.

As mentioned before the average household income in 1970 (Boomer’s time) was $8300. When accounted for inflation that changes it to $58,800 in today’s dollars, but the average income of today’s American household is actually almost $67,500 which is more. So yes, the average housing cost went up, but so did the average household income. This is also at a time when the average household income includes a lot more single people just supporting themselves and choosing not to have a family than ever before.

The difference is in spending patterns. People spend more on recreation than ever before. People take out loans for tens of thousands of dollars on a degree they have no chance at getting a career with. The American Dream has been corrupted from, “work hard, make good choices, and you can accomplish your goals” to “Do whatever you feel. You deserve everything you want, and no one should ever tell you no. If they do, they are just stealing from you.”

Now, I don’t believe that every millionaire worked hard and earned their money. The government in particular is filled with people who played the system and did steal other people’s money. I don’t care which side of the aisle they sit on. Yet somehow those same millionaire politicians who have made their money by telling you that hard working rich people are stealing your money and you need to give them more money and vote them in so they can steal even more money have convinced an entire generation that the American Dream is not real… because hard work is the invention of evil people who are stealing your money.

Here’s the thing about Capitalism and the American Dream. You don’t have to go to work and make minimum wage. You don’t have to take out loans from the government to learn the things they want to teach you. That’s just what those in charge want you to believe so they can keep making money off of you. If you want to succeed in life, you just have to follow the true American Dream path. You have to work hard. You have to sacrifice some of your now, and some of your fun for a better later. You have to make good choices with your money and with your relationships. You have to take responsibility for your life. That is what being free is all about. That is the reason that millions of people have risked their lives to come here and are still risking their lives today.

The same people who hate the American Dream are the same people fighting for others to be able to come here. They understand how dehumanizing other countries can still be. How slavery is still in existence and human rights are still quashed all over the world, and yet they complain because they have to actually sacrifice their everyday latte and upgrade to the next iPhone in order to buy a dream home. Not to get shelter, which other countries don’t have, but to buy their 3-bedroom, private back yard, and maybe a pool… DREAM home.

There’s a line in the original Matrix movie in which Mr. Smith explains to Neo that the machines had tried to create a utopia for the humans but that the humans kept waking up. They couldn’t handle it. Humans crave conflict. They need something to fight against. A lot of people just curb that need by watching dramas on TV where they root for the hero and feel justified when they win. In fact, this is a primarily American thing as well. Not all countries create movies, TV shows, books, in which the hero wins. Some people elsewhere find it quite trite, but Americans need it. Americans, on the whole, have nothing real left to fight for. We have equal rights. We have the ability to get anything we accomplish if we just work hard and make good choices. Americans are now pushing back on what has already been accomplished and blaming, not those who don’t work hard or make good choices for their problems, but those who do for somehow creating a society in which these things are necessary.

The American Dream is alive and well. In fact, it’s so easy to obtain those who don’t are seen as not the problem, but as victims of the ease of society. Something must be wrong with society as a whole if some find it so easy and others can’t “catch a break”. Of course, in order to catch something, you have to go out into the field and put out your glove. You can’t just wait for someone to hand it to you. The American Dream is all about getting out into the field and doing your part. It’s probably why Baseball is our pastime.

pexels-photo-6055989.jpeg
bullying, Law of Attraction, Love, Mental Health, parenting, Prayer

Forgive and Forget

Katrina Russell

People talk a lot about forgiveness, and there are definitely two camps on this subject. Well, three if you count the people who keep forgiving over and over and not the forgetting part, but for this we won’t. For this we are talking about the people who are done taking flack and listening to lies.

In one camp there are the people who will never forgive. “Those *fill in expletive* don’t deserve my forgiveness”, people. The ones who every time a name is mentioned, even if it’s not the actual person, just the name in common, this one gets a knot in their stomach. This one has been hurt so badly they will never forget, and never give anyone else a chance to hurt them like that either. They will take that pain to the grave, and to whatever afterlife may come.

This is the one that tells you they are fine, while simultaneously screwing up something in their life. A friendship, a romantic relationship, a family situation, a job… something that reminds this one of that person who did that thing to them once and they are not going to let that happen again.

When that person or that subject does come up, this one still sees red. They can’t help it. It’s still so fresh in their mind and heart. They can’t let it go. They are angry and will continue to be angry. There is no way that this one is going to give that person the satisfaction of being let off the hook for the horrible thing that they did. That person is going to die knowing that this one hates them.

Of course, that person may not care, or even remember this one… but that’s not the point… this one will remember… always.

Then there are the ones that know how to forgive and how to forget. The ones who understand that everyone has faults, and everyone is at a different point in the evolutionary scale. This one knows what horrible thing that person did to them. This one knows that person is not capable of the actions or respect that this one deserves. This one feels almost sorry for the person who did them dirty, because this one understands that true happiness can never be found in hurting someone, and the person who hurt them will have to live with everything they do… but this one does not.

This one has learned holding onto a grudge only hurts the one holding on. This one forgives the person who wronged them… and then lets it go. That’s it. It is now a thing of the past. It no longer takes up room in their conscious mind. This one goes about their life not worrying about what the other person did or is doing now. This one goes about their life not assuming that everyone they meet will be like that person and hurt them.

Then there is a moment in this one’s life when they realize they have actually forgotten. Maybe they see that person at an event, or their name is brought up. This one smiles, asks how they are, and have a pleasant encounter. Maybe at some point someone reminds this one of what the other person has done. This one just laughs, and says, “well, it was a long time ago. We’ve all grown since then.”.

Maybe we’ve all grown, maybe that person is just as rotten and hurtful as they always were, but it doesn’t matter. This one has grown. This one has a good life. That person who hurt this one doesn’t have any power over this one. This one has forgiven and forgotten.

white concrete building
bullying, Politics, Prayer

It’s not about oppression, it’s about success

Katrina Russell

There has been a lot in the media in the last few years about the oppressed and the oppressors. How certain groups have more power and success in life because they spend all of their time oppressing other people. How there is a new group coming out of the oppressor group in order to “save” the historically oppressed people.

They are doing this by teaching people whether they are oppressed or oppressors, because nothing cures oppression like telling someone that they are oppressed and shouldn’t bother trying. They are also doing this by getting rid of tests and regulations that judge people based on the merit. The implication being that people of certain groups can’t be expected to live up to the expectations of the oppressor groups and therefore are being further oppressed by a society that values merit.

I’m not sure how teaching kids particularly that they are some how incapable of merit based accomplishments eliminates oppression, but that is the point. The people who talk so much about caring about and helping the oppressed don’t actually care about oppression. They only care about who is getting, making, or having more than they are. The goal is not to end oppression, but to oppress the successful in order to steal more power for themselves.

If you ever want to know how someone feels about oppressed people ask them what they think about the Jews, and specifically Israel. Jewish people are the historically the most oppressed people in the world. They were slaves in the age of the Bible. They have been homeless since they were first enslaved. They have been told they can’t work. They have been murdered. They have had an entire world against them, and yet they are the one group of people to never tried to conquer anyone else. That’s actually their thing. They don’t look to convert. They are a race unto themselves not just a religion. They don’t stop those who choose to convert, but they do not send people to your door on a Sunday afternoon, and they have never invaded anyone.

In 1948. after it as discovered that millions of them were killed for no reason, it was decided by the world that they needed a safe place they could call their own. People are angry about this. People are angry because a piece of land that had been historically Abrahamic territory, but was invaded and stolen by others was being returned to them. The same people who complain about Native American land being stolen by white settlers because, “The Natives were there first” complain that the Israelites got their land back. No race has ever been more cohesive than the Jewish people. They are not just a religion but a race as well, and they do their best to keep their way of life unchanged for centuries. Where as the Native Americans were thousands of different tribes who came to the American continent over thousands of years and spent most of that time killing each other to extinction.

Jewish people, however, are known to be hard working. It’s part of their culture. No matter how many times they are knocked down, they keep their heads down and keep working for their families and their faith… and they are hated for it. There is no group in the world so universally hated. There was just a hostage situation in TX in which a Muslim extremist specifically targeted a Synagogue on the Sabbath, and took hostages. The news kind of mentioned something about a UK man taking hostages but they weren’t sure why… it’s over now, it doesn’t really matter.

Except it does. This was a terrorist attack. This was a hate crime. The fact that a Muslim extremist specifically targeted a Synagogue on the holiest day of the week was not a coincidence, but let’s not make people think poorly of Muslim terrorist… that wouldn’t be PC.

If oppression, and not personal choices is what causes inequality and poverty then how does one explain the Jews. They are the doctors, the lawyers, the accountants. They run the banks. They are the evil rich people… who have been historically oppressed by everyone. People don’t want to help the oppress. They just hate the rich. If you don’t believe me. Ask them how they feel about Israel.

stone statue of leader of civil rights movement in washington dc
Love

Why we honor MLK

Katrina Russell

Today is a day to honor Rev Dr Martin Luthor King Jr. This is a very important day, and it is very significant that we honor and remember all of his accomplishments, as well as his message of peace.

There were many civil rights leaders of that time, but he is the only one with a day. Some consider this racist. Those people probably are the same people who think pancake syrup is racist. What makes a person worth an honor and a remembrance, like a day or a statue, is not just that they aim for a particular goal, but the way that they go about doing it.

MLK was all about peace. Peaceful resistance, and love. Love for all fellow men. He was not looking to elevate anyone over anyone else. He was looking to accomplish equality among all individuals. He did this by reminding people not to hurt others but to embrace them. To be allies and friends. He wanted his kids to walk with the white kids not against them or above them.

We honor MLK because of the accomplishments that he gave to this country, and the hardships he and his family endured for doing so. We do not honor MLK because he was a perfect man. This is an important distinction. This is something that some people have forgotten. No one is perfect. No one is without sin. Everyone is a product of their time, and a slave to their vices, and Dr King was no exception.

All over the country people are tearing down statues of freedom fighters because they disagree with something or another about the person. The person is not the point. The person is a symbol of the movement. Just as Dr King was a symbol of the non-violent civil rights movement that touched the hearts of people not just all over the country, but all over the world.

There are not statues to Dr King for being a philanderer. There are not statues to Dr King for being a rapist. There are not statues of Dr King for being a Communist. Though he was all of those things. He was a person. A person who had demons. A person who was a product of his time. A person that did unspeakable things behind closed doors, but who still brought a message of hope and peace to the world.

Never meet your heroes. It’s an old expression usually used now to talk about movie stars and athletes, but its origin is unclear. Everyone wants to attribute it to the person they first heard say it. Which in and of itself is ironic as they are putting the quote to the person they admire, but the point remains. No one is perfect. No one is the angel we know in our imagination. Dr King is no different.

It is amazing and wonderful that Dr King has a day to remember him. It is unbelievable that it happened so quickly considering he was fighting for the right to be treated as an equal, and less that 20 years after his death he was granted a Federal Holiday. In fact, other than Columbus, he is the only individual with a Federal Holiday named after him. We used to have Washington’s birthday, but that has since been converted to Presidents Day and now they all share it. Similar to Veterans Day.

Rev Dr Martin Luthor King is the only American to ever have a day named and celebrated for him, and he had a horrible history of sex crimes and treating women horribly. Does that mean we should take away his day? Does that mean we should rename all of the MLK Blvds all over the country? Or does that mean that we understand that he wasn’t perfect, but we honor him for the accomplishments and the amazing things that he did do? I say the latter, and I say the same for all of our other people in history. We don’t honor Jefferson and Washington for owning slaves, and we don’t honor MLK for his sins either. Let thee without sin cast the first stone. Until then, Let’s remember the good we’ve all done.

Healthcare, parenting, Politics

Freedom is Hard

Katrina Russell

Freedom and rights are hard concepts to understand. Most people are under the impression that each of these represent things that should be given to them. “I have the right to have a house or a new iPhone or whatever medical care I need therefore you must give it to me.”. But those are not rights. Those are desires. You have the right to purchase any of those things and no one should be able to infringe on your rights to work hard and accomplish things, but that is not the same as being given something.

As people we have the right to be left alone and to do as we please. The choices we make then decide the life that we lead. This has become completely turned around by everyone. Most people in our society and in every political party seems to think that freedom means doing whatever one wants without consequence and rights are to have whatever they choose without the needs to work for them.

Growing up my father always said that the job of a parent was to raise children to be independent. Children who can take care of themselves after the parent is gone, and hopefully take care of the parent after they are no longer able to care for themself. That’s freedom. Not having to depend on others. That’s rights, being free to make decisions that enable you to be free, and all of it is hard.

Now, just to be clear. I am not opposed to social programs. I live in Massachusetts, and we even have a socialized healthcare program that was put forth by Mitt Romney about 20 years ago and has been working pretty well ever since. I am quite liberal on many of these subjects, but they are not rights. No one has the right to food that they didn’t grow or buy themselves. No one has the right to someone else’s labor. However, if in a specific community people decide that they want to help out their fellow neighbors in need with programs they choose to pay into that is also freedom, and their right to do so. The right to do what they wish with the benefits of one’s own labor is a right, and a freedom. Someone who feels they are in power over the people telling them they must give up their labor to someone else is extortion.

The flip side of this is cancel culture. The act of looking for anything that someone has ever done that was questionable and then spreading it to everyone possible in order to ruin someone. Those who believe in cancel culture say that it’s all fair because with freedom comes consequences and actions have consequences, which is true. The actions themselves do, but, for instance, the teenage girl who used the “N” word while quoting a rap song to tell another white friend she got driver’s license when she was 16 years old and then was not allowed into the college of her choice years later because someone held onto that information for the perfect strategic moment to inflict as much damage as possible is a classic example of the actions and consequences not matching. The girl didn’t use the word with racist intent, and she was a child when she said it with a very limited understanding of the world and the rules that go with it. This may have been a teaching moment at most, but not a nuclear bomb to her life moment.

Today we are seeing a serious push against freedom everywhere we look. We are seeing people’s speech being censored, we are seeing places of worship being shut down, we are seeing people’s jobs and right to work being eliminated, and we’re seeing all of this under the guise of “leaders” keeping us safe. We are being told that we have no RIGHT to know what our children are being taught in schools, and that we have no RIGHT to speak out against those who are in power regardless of whether or not we are correct in our assertions or not.

We are told that our safety takes priority and that those in charge are the ones to make that decision. That is not how this country was designed. That is not what our forefathers fought for, that’s not what anyone agreed to when they chose to move here from wherever they came. This country was settled by people who were willing to fight and die for the lives they chose to live. It doesn’t matter which settlers we’re talking about. Whether it be the settlers who came over from Asia for thousands of years, the Europeans who came over for hundreds of years, or the many other groups who are still fighting to come over today.

The Asians (now called Native Americans or First Nations or whatever new term of the month it is) and the Europeans came over and dealt with harsh weather, new species of animals, and which ever groups of people had come before them. Most people died. Thousands of tribes of Natives were made extinct before the Europeans even knew this place existed, and hundreds of settlements never made it through a winter once they did, but group after group still come.

Today we see caravans of people walking thousands of miles from South America. We see families risking life and limb in shark infested oceans to just set foot on our shores to gain the freedoms we take for granted. Millions of Africans, Asians, and Arabs have come in the last hundred years knowing that they have to learn the language and the new customs to fit in with our society and they welcome the opportunity, because they know that our society isn’t easy, but if they work hard their children and their children’s children will have a better life here.

Freedom and Rights are not about the to stay safe or the right to never die. Freedom and Rights are about making choices that fit your life and no one stopping you, especially not the government you employ to protect your rights. If you want more privileges, then by all means ask for them. Talk to your communities about sharing the responsibilities for those who can’t or those who won’t, but don’t pretend it’s your right to control someone else or to take the fruits of their labor. That’s just theft, and you have no right to that.