Category: bullying

roadway with end racism now title in town
bullying, cancel culture, free speech, parenting, Politics

Redefining Racism

Katrina Russell

racist

noun

  1. A person who believes a particular race is superior to others.
  2. a person with a prejudiced belief that one race is superior to others

That has been the standard definition since it was a thing. It is how slave owners felt. It is how KKK members felt, and much to Whoopi Goldberg’s chagrin, it is how the Nazis felt. Racism has always been about one group feeling superior to another group.

Racism is not when someone points out differences between groups. In fact, differences between groups should be celebrated not treated like an insult. It’s not racism when someone from a different group does, says, wears, or otherwise “appropriates” something from another group. If the person doing, saying, wearing, or what have you was racist they would think that the “others” group was inferior and NOT “appropriate” their culture. I guarantee you no Nazi was “appropriating” Jewish culture.

Racism is also not pointing out how different cultures have different values, traditions, and ideas. Such as some cultures value education, some cultures value religion, some cultures value violence and scamming the system. Racism is, however, claiming that someone from a particular race is unable to break away from their culture and adopt different values, and that the only way anyone from one group could possibly succeed is to either lower the standards or by way of help from the “better, more advanced race”. That’s just full-on racism in it’s true form.

Today people who believe the second version are doing their best to make those who understand the first version are the true racists. So, for instance, one group says, “Society has rules. They are rules that, as a society we have found better the life of everyone involved. If you would like to better your life, then just follow these simple rules and you too will see that your life is better.”. These rules have come from centuries of seeing how different societies all over the world have succeeded and bringing them all together to create something new.

The United States is a great example of this set of rules. They are considered “White” rules because the majority of people in the US are white, but in reality, a lot of these rules come from many cultures not formally considered “white” by traditional standards. Ironically, the racial groups not previously considered white actually can be found to be more successful, because traditionally they place a bigger value on family and tend to live together and support each other longer. In fact, “white” used to be only British people. As white only became a race in segregated America at a time when the dominant race was British. Even Italians, Irish, Germans were all different races in all other terms. But with segregation it was decided that there needed to be a term that separated ex slaves from the common citizenry. Thus “White” was born.

Now “white” is used as a synonym for success. Anyone who becomes successful is now either considered white or “trying to be white”. So, for instance, Asians are now on the hierarchy stage of being white adjacent because they are one of the highest earning groups in American society. They get into elite colleges at a higher rate as well, therefore a cap had to be put on the number of Asians allowed into the elite colleges because of course it wasn’t fair to those whose cultures don’t put hard work and success on the list of values to attain. And let’s not forget any black person that does rise to success and pay tribute to hard work and perseverance… they just “want to be white”.

Now it is the fault of the hard working that those who don’t work hard don’t succeed, because “everyone knows ‘those people’ aren’t capable of hard work”. This is the crap that’s being taught in schools. It’s being taught that one group is oppressed by the system because it is set up for those capable of hard work. The Smithsonian came out with a breakdown of “white supremacist” which included things like hard work and being on time. Groups are pushing to remove tests and having to answer questions correctly because it oppresses a whole group of people not capable of such feats. There are groups of people pushing to stop police from arresting those who steal because they’re not capable of doing real work to earn goods. Today Biden put aside $30 million to give crack pipes out to inner city black people in the name of equity. Because that’s what “those people” really want. There’s a reason why the new Black Heroes are all violent criminals, and people like Dr King and Fredrick Douglas are having their statues torn down.

Racism is alive and well in this country, but we have to call it out when we see it, and we have to use words properly. Racism is not understanding that racial/ethnic groups are different and have different values, traditions, and ideas. Racism is believing that people from one racial/ethnic group is incapable of being successful simply because of their racial/ethnic group.

bullying, cancel culture, free speech, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

Why does fear trump logic in society?

Katrina Russell

I’m mostly talking about American society since that’s the one that a I live in. I just don’t understand it. America was always the land of the FREE and the home of the BRAVE. This is the one country that everyone came to that had nothing to fall back on when they got here. Or at least it was. Now it’s the home of “give me free stuff and if you don’t, I’ll label you the problem”.

I read articles and see news casters all the time talking about how they would never sit down and have a conversation with someone they disagree with. How you should never give them a platform or trying to get someone they disagree with platformed. I don’t care which side of the isle it’s on. I saw the same thing written about The View and CNN from the Right as I see about Joe Rogan from the Left, even before Whoopi’s ignorant racism and the evidence that no one at CNN can keep it in their pants.

I was amazed at how many people either quit or were dragged for not quitting during the Trump administration, because they didn’t like him. So what? You don’t like that man. That has nothing to do with your job. Go to work, do the best job you can and make the difference that you want to make. You like or dislike for your boss should be irrelevant. Imagine if all the firefighters who didn’t like their bosses just quit. The country would be in chaos. When did people get so soft?

The irony is that so many people think if these cowardice acts as brave. As if saying, “naa na nah boo boo, I don’t need to listen to you”, is brave. People have become so used to living in their own little bubbles they have no idea what reality is. They have no idea what true bravery is. Bravery isn’t banning together with a group of people who agree with you and prop you up at all times, while ostracizing anyone who dares have a different opinion that you. Bravery is having open dialog with someone that you disagree with. Listening to their perspective and possibly learning something new that may indicate that you are wrong. No one wants to do that anymore.

If you say someone’s opinion is wrong, it’s like you’re berating their very character. People all over the country are on anti-anxiety medication just because there’s a slight chance something vaguely uncomfortable may happen to them. There are entire internet posts that people share over and over about a thing that happened to them and they can never show their faces again, because they made a mistake one. A mistake. A normal everyday occurrence that happens to everyone. But no… a mistake is a sign of being less than. If I make a mistake, I must shut myself away forever, and if you make a mistake, I must make sure that you are shut away forever. You must never go to college, or get a job, or get married, or have children… or live a life in anyway, because only the perfect who agree with everything that my peer group agrees with and never makes a mistake has the right to live.

The most deranged thing is that this society is one that pushes inclusion and acceptance. We MUST accept everyone regardless of their differences, as long as they’re not different than me, or in any way considered to be better than me. We have to accept fat people but shun anyone who enjoys healthy living. We must accept POC but reject anyone proud of their white heritage. We must accept the LGBT>>> community, but ridicule anyone who believes in Judeo/Christian beliefs. The only beliefs that are criticized, by the way. If you’re Hindi, Muslim, Wiccan you are to be praised yourself for being so brave.

If you want to truly be empowered the key is not to block yourself off from disagreement or feeling uncomfortable; it’s putting yourself out there. Having conversations with those you disagree with. Test your theories. Hear other’s opinions. You never know, you may realize you were actually right after all, or you may realize you didn’t have all the information. Either way you can be proud of yourself for true and good actions instead of lying to yourself into placation.

black metal train rails
bullying, cancel culture, free speech, Politics

Whoopi another person cancelled

Katrina Russell

I really don’t know when this became a thing. People are literally not allowed to have conversations or be wrong. It’s amazing how not only does Freedom of Speech mean nothing to anyone anymore, but neither does human decency.

First the world went on a tirade against Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan who is the most respectful, mild-mannered celebrity probably in existence. That may have to do with his love for pot, but the point stands. Joe Rogan has made a career, a very successful and well-loved career, by simply having conversations with people. That’s it. He lets people talk and he listens and gives his opinions on what they are talking about.

This is a man who spent most of his life in comedy clubs and fighting rings. He has met all kinds of people and has quite the “lived experience” as people like to say. They also love to say that because he was a fighter that automatically makes him an idiot, but no one creates a business like his is an idiot. People say that you shouldn’t take medical advice from a comedian. Which is true. He doesn’t give medical advice. He sits down and has conversations with medical professionals. The same people who say they shouldn’t listen to him, or his conversations are the same people who swear by Rachel Maddow’s words… last I checked she didn’t have a medical degree either. She just talks to people.

The other day Whoopi Goldberg made an ignorant comment. Plain and simple it was strictly ignorant. She had no idea what she was talking about. She only knows what she knows, and that’s fine. In her lived experience there has been no other race issue other than Black and White. That’s fine. She’s allowed to feel that way. That is what she has been taught. That is what is preached to her every day in all the other media outlets. She should not have been put on leave. She should have been educated.

People today only want to destroy. They only want to tear things down. No one wants to learn or understand. When someone makes an incorrect statement, the crowds jump on them and insult and degrade them. When someone tries to explain something that another doesn’t agree with, they’re called some sort of ist… racist, sexist… No one can just have conversations anymore.

The irony is that when Whoopi was called out and suspended from her show her response was that she thought they were just having a conversation. That sharing her opinion was what the show is all about. Which it is or at least it was originally designed as different types of women who have different types of opinions. Now anyone with a differing opinion gets shunned in the least and ostracized at the most basic level.

People seemed to have forgotten what civil disagreements are. Now if anyone says anything that they disagree with, even out of ignorance like Whoopi, they are to be punished to the full extent. This Jewish race conversation was a perfect opportunity for a teaching moment. The View should have scheduled guests on that were Holocaust survivors and/or historians to speak to the women about the reality of the time.

Whoopi’s perspective is a very common one in today’s America. People only see history and the world through the small lens of current events. Race is about Black and White. There was no White race 200 years ago. There was barely one 100 years ago. There were Colored and not Colored in America but nowhere else was that in issue, because nowhere else were there so many Black people.

Most of the world consisted of English, French, German, Irish, Dutch, Spanish, Italian, Greek, Persian, Russian, Indian, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese, Egyptian, Libyan, Sudanese, Nigerian… and so forth, and of course Jewish who really had no home. Before that they were even more broken up into tribes within the countries. Everyone loved the movie 300. They know the phrase “This is Sparta!”. Sparta was just an area, a tribe in Greece, but they didn’t consider themselves to be part of the collective. They were their own people. Race is an ever-flowing construct. Usually based on the community that you live within. America is the first of its kind to be a true melting pot where every generation becomes more and more mixed. This is something people need to talk about.

Joe Rogan gets complaints because he lets people speak. He doesn’t take sound bites and create a narrative that supports his agenda. He has people, often from opposing sides, come in and speak together. This is something that we need more of. We need more open dialog. We need to see on more news outlets, longform conversations with people who have differing opinions on many topics. No one side is always right and no one side should have complete control over what is said.

This is the reason for Freedom of Speech. The good ideas will triumph over the bad ideas because of open dialog. People will have a chance to make their claims and give evidence to support it, hear evidence that goes against it and come to a general understanding of it all. Cancelling people who disagree with us creates an ignorant society. One in which people don’t know that the Holocaust was about racism.

pexels-photo-3671145.jpeg
bullying, parenting, Politics

Welcome to 1984

Katrina Russell

I’m starting to think that no one has actually read the book. I see comments all the time about authoritarian dictators who are basically Nazis who are causing problems by not following orders. It’s almost like when you were a kid and played “opposite day”. Everything that they say is the exact opposite of what the words mean.

For those who are unaware of the actual meaning.

authoritarianə-thôr″ĭ-târ′ē-ən, ə-thŏr″-, ô-

adjective

  1. Characterized by or favoring absolute obedience to authority, as against individual freedom.
  2. Tending to tell other people what to do in a peremptory or arrogant manner. synonym: dictatorial.
  3. characteristic of an absolute ruler or absolute rule; having absolute sovereignty; — of governments or rulers

So, against individual freedom. Against people making their own choices. An oligarchy of Elites who think they know better than everyone else and should be listened to at all costs. Anyone who goes against them should be arrested, punished, cancelled. There is no room for discourse. No room for debate. No room for a conversation.

The problem with any of these things is that it gives people a choice. A choice to disagree with the Elite in power. A choice to take a different path. Authoritarians can’t give people choices. They can’t allow for facts to come out that go against the rule of law they have laid down. They gain their power by spreading fear. Fear of something outside only they can protect you from. Fear of them and what may happen to you if you disagree with them. Fear of being ostracized. They don’t fight their opposition with reality. They name call and discredit with more fear.

When questioned about their ideas they just spew lies about the inquisitor. Anyone who questions their doctrine is evil. They are racist, sexist, Nazis… When you question their followers with facts to back it up, they just reply in kind… you’re a racist, sexist, Nazi… nothing in your actions speaks to any of this. Nothing in the conversation had anything to do with this, but the authoritarian can’t keep power unless they keep the fear alive.

Words stop having meaning. Who cares if someone is called a racist if everyone is a racist? Who cares if someone is called a Nazi if everyone is a Nazi? If you want to know what someone really is, ask them they’re own personal opinions on things and why they feel that way and where they got their information. You probably won’t be surprised when those touting the authoritarian line says they got their information from the authoritarian regime but have no actual facts to back it up… other than, you’re a racist, sexist, Nazi for even thinking about questioning it.

For those who are following the line because you feel you have no choice, I feel sorry. For those who are following the dictate because you’ve never bothered to think for yourself, I feel pity. For those who are following the dictate because you want the power for yourself, I feel disgust. 1984 should be read by every person in the world. Not just memed about… but actually read. If more people picked up a book once in a while instead of being brain washed by talking heads this planet might just be ok.

people wearing diy masks
Addiction, bullying, grief, Healthcare, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

Death Happens

Katrina Russell

I don’t know what has been going on in the last couple years that suddenly we can’t go back to normal until all death has been stopped. Well, all covid deaths. They are willing to let kids kill themselves, and overdose on drugs. They are willing to take dying people off of transplant lists if they don’t conform to their politics, because none of that matters except stopping anyone from ever dying of Covid-19 again. We need to stop death itself… in the case of Covid-19 anyway.

The problem is no one can stop death. The more we try the worse it gets. People are becoming obsessed with death. With Covid death specifically. People have locked themselves in their house. They refuse to see family and friends. They won’t work. They won’t go outside in the fresh air for fear it may be contaminated.

Obesity is the number one killer in this country (the US), and yet because of lockdowns weight gain has been skyrocketing. Everyone is so afraid of catching Covid they are making themselves more vulnerable to it. And let’s be honest, when it comes to weight gain Covid is the least of people’s problems. With everyone so obsessed with controlling “The Spread” people have paid no attention to the real killers in this country. Heart Disease, Cancer, and Diabetes are still high on the list.

People are so fearful to live they are missing out on life. When I talk to others about it they say that I can’t possibly understand because I don’t have anyone in my life to worry about. I’ve already lost them all. My grams, and father’s s/o died of Alzheimer’s, my dad died of Diabetes, my mom died of pneumonia, and my son’s father died of a drug overdose. They are right. I’m not scared of a virus. I’m not scared of a cold. I know that life is short, and anything can take anyone at any time.

When my loved ones died, I didn’t fight for the government to make us wear masks so no one would get pneumonia. I didn’t fight for the government to impose restrictions on sugary foods and mandate exercise to prevent Diabetes. I didn’t fight for the government to not allow anyone treatment if they made choices that the government disagreed with. My father ended up with type 1 diabetes, it wasn’t all personal choices, but he still could have taken care of it better. My son’s father was an addict… that’s all lifestyle. Yet the same people saying that no one who doesn’t choose vaccination should be treated, because it’s they’re fault… yet, most heart disease, diabetes, cancer, and certainly addiction is, if not caused, compounded by personal choices. No one would expect the government to not treat or lock down or not give passports to be in society to those with these lifestyle diseases. Don’t even get me started on STDs.

We are never going to stop death. We are never going to save everyone. We are never going to fix the world. The best we can do is live in it, and that starts by opening our doors, taking off the damn masks, and seeing each other again. Before we all die of old age.

pexels-photo-374918.jpeg
bullying, Mental Health, parenting, Politics

It’s ok to be wrong

Katrina Russell

I have been told my whole life that I can’t admit to being wrong. Yet, I admit I’m wrong all the time. In fact, the same people who tell me that I can’t admit to being wrong are always making the joke of, “let me mark the calendar” or “let me get this is writing” or “let me record this”… yet, they ALWAY make this joke because I admit I’m wrong all the time.

They have confused not admitting that I’m wrong with not caving when I know that I’m right. A classic example of this is when I went to get ice cream with one of these friends. I was ordering my usual, baby peppermint stick with jimmies (chocolate sprinkles for those not in Boston). The order came to $3.10. My friend then ordered a baby peppermint stick. She had $3.00 on her and asked if I had $.10 to borrow. I told her that I had it, but that she shouldn’t need it as she didn’t get any jimmies. She responded that didn’t matter. That jimmies were free. I said that I was always charged jimmies before, but that this particular ice cream stand was a place that she frequented more than I did so maybe they didn’t charge. I got out a quarter to cover her. The ice cream kid then came back and charged her $2.80. For those who aren’t good at math, that’s less. $.30 less to be precise… which I have to say is a lot of jimmies, but alas. She then turned to me angrily saying, “You always have to be right!”.

This, I find, is the difference between someone who always has to be right and someone who is just stubborn. I will own stubborn all day long. I have my thoughts, opinions, and knowledge and I stand by them, but I don’t always have to be right. I am more than willing to change my mind when new evidence is presented.

I have spent a lot of my life in school and/or taking classes. I read constantly. I watch videos on the internet, now that it’s a thing. I love to learn new things. I am constantly getting information that I hadn’t previously had. When I enter into a conversation, I know what I know and am willing to listen to the other person to see if they have anything to offer that may change my opinion. As with the ice cream shop, I was willing to contend that I was not as familiar with that particular store and therefore may not have knowledge about their practices that my friend had.

I think I get this from my upbringing. My brother is very different than me, and therefore thinks and interacts with things very different than me. We often have conversations about subjects that I know a little about and then he informs me of things that I was never made aware of, and it shifts my perspective, and vice versa. He had no idea that babies lost all their baby teeth, even after having my son. He didn’t believe me and had to Google it… I was right… I like being right… but I don’t HAVE to be, and therein lies the difference.

Lately people have been very divided on many issues. So divided that they are not even willing to listen to the other side. Anyone who disagrees with them is just labeled either stupid or evil. The problem is that everything in life has many parts, and many layers, and no one is always right, and no one is always wrong. The best way to get to the truth is to talk with people whom you disagree and actually listen to the other side. No one wants to do this anymore.

People are now intrinsically tied to their beliefs. It has become their identity. If you dare to disagree with someone it’s as if you are degrading the person’s actual self. It is no longer about facts and information it’s about how you feel about a situation that matters. By stating facts that disagree with someone’s feelings the person feels as if the fact spouter is destroying the person that they are, instead of just an idea that can be modified.

People are downright terrified to be wrong. To have their beliefs and therefore their reality and life questioned is the same as killing them. So, it’s been termed that words are violence. If you say words that go against anything that I believe you are now trying to destroy my reality and in turn kill me. No one can be wrong. No one can be mistaken. No one can be misinformed. Everyone has to follow the same way of thought, or they are the enemy.

The thing is facts are facts. My friend who believed that there was no cost for jimmies wasn’t right just because she thought it. Had it been reversed, and she was the one to order the jimmies and therefore charged extra she still would have had to pay it no matter her belief on the matter.

It’s ok to be wrong. Everyone is wrong all the time. It is not about you. The next time you find yourself pushing back. Insulting someone or hating someone because they have information that doesn’t match your beliefs trying talking with them. Maybe you have information that they don’t, and you may change their minds… or maybe you’re just wrong. Either way you will walk away stronger, and more informed and that’s what life is about.

boy wearing green crew neck shirt jumping from black stone on seashore
bullying, Love, parenting, Politics

Boys will be Boys

Katrina Russell

When did being a boy become toxic? People are literally outraged by kids’ t-shirts that say, “Boys will be Boys”. I would say that I don’t know what they want them to be, but we all know that’s not true. They want little boys to be anything but boys.

When did just being a boy become harmful and worthy of condemnation? Here’s the thing, boys will be boys. That’s what they are. They can’t help being a boy any more than a girl can help being a girl. Somehow saying that a boy being a boy has been conflated with being violent for violence’s sake, with rape, with just blatant hostility. Honestly if this is the only kind of boy you know you need to make new friends.

Boys are boys. They roughhouse, they break things in their attempts to try something new, they dig at each other, they even fight… they are way more active than girls and have a hard time sitting still. Boys will be boys because boys are boys.

Boys are more than twice as likely to be diagnosed and medicated for ADHD because they have trouble sitting and listening in school. I know this is surprising to everyone who has ever been to school, but school is boring. It just is. It doesn’t have to be, but that’s how it has been designed. It’s designed to create cogs who don’t question authority and can be put at a machine for long hours without break. That’s it.

Boys aren’t designed for that. Boys are designed to slay dragons. If you want to judge a boy’s attention span don’t sit him in a classroom listening to someone drone on; put him in front of his favorite video game, or his favorite adventure series/comic book, let him play a sport. He probably knows every stat of his favorite team, but yeah that poem he read in English class drifted right out of his head.

Boys and girls are different. That’s just a fact. Funny enough, the same people who hate the “Boys will be Boys” t-shirt are the same people saying there is nothing different between a boy and a girl that society doesn’t teach them. Yet, societies are different all over the world. Societies in Europe are different than those in America, those in America are different from those in Asia, those in Asia are different from those in Africa… they are even different amongst themselves, but the one thing that is never different is that boys, and men are the risk takers. They are, for the most point, the leaders, the warriors, the prisoners. The ones that risk it all for what they desire. The women have been the diplomats, the care takers, the mothers. No one assigned these roles all over the world, they are the roles people chose over and over. Men slay the dragon; women hold down the fort.

The exception to the rule proves the rule has never been clearer than in male/female relations. Women and men choose their roles. There have been plenty of women in positions of power. There have been Queens, and Prime Ministers, and Scientists, and Military Leaders… all of this is true. All of this shows that men are willing to follow women who prove themselves to be worthy of the position. Women who are willing to fight just as hard and as smart as they are. Men choose or (in the case of Queens) resign themselves to follow women all the time. There are countless women who have ruled over men since recorded time and have been quite successful. Society didn’t stop them.

The difference between men and women is that men, in general, want to rule. They want to prove themselves. They desire the power. Women want comfort. They want to know that they and their children are safe. The best way to do that is to find the most powerful man they can and let him protect her. That is a girl being a girl. And when men are looking for the right women, they are looking for the most compassionate they can find in order to know that they will be good to their children. It’s actual biological evolution at work.

Again, the same people who hate men, who think men and women are the same except for how society trains them are the same people who believe that evolution is the only answer to humankind… and yet, when told that evolution is what created society, they scoff… and blame men.

I feel bad for the woman who hates men. In a way they have been trained to hate themselves. They see themselves as less than because of the man’s power instead of equal but different.

I have a son. He’s only 8, and he is the sweetest boy you could meet. He also comes home with random holes in his clothes, and the list of nurse visits at his school is extensive. He was hesitant about continuing in his Karate class because they had to start punching and kicking, yet he’s been known to lay out a bully when required.

The thing about men is that they are complicated. Some women just see them as Neanderthals that never evolved, but the thing about boys is that they are like puppies. If you treat them well and love them, you will have a cuddly protector. If you don’t, they grow up to be the feral beast you expected. Men have the power and strength to drop any woman at any time… but they don’t. That is the mark of a real man, and why letting boys be boys is the best way to make sure they become real men.

woman in black shirt holding red lipstick
bullying, Politics

Everything is Sexist

Katrina Russell

I was born in the mid 70s. I was raised in the 80s, right in the heart of Feminism. When women were all about pant suits and shoulder pads. Every girl knew the words to “Working 9-5”. We were taught from a young age that we could do anything that a boy could do and not to take any flack just because we were girls.

Today women make up 60% of college students. Women make more money than men on average in their 20s. Approximately 25% of Congress, 18% of Governors, and 25% of Mayors are Women, and of course we have our first female Vice President. There are lists of the Top Ten Female CEOs in the World, not to mention all the everyday female owned and operated female companies. Women are doing what women have been fighting for over a century to do. They are ruling… and yet it’s not enough.

Women have women only gyms, and women only clubs, but if a men decide they want to have a men’s only area it’s sexism. Women can sleep around, and play games and they are Queens. If men do it, they’re users. Women have multiple baby daddies and live off the system so they don’t have to work, and it’s all good. Women can sleep around, get pregnant, and decide it’s fine to just kill the baby and people cheer for her. If men say they don’t feel ready to have a kid, they are dead beats.

Women in America today have no idea what oppression is. They think it’s someone calling them “Sweetie”. They think it’s a guy looking when they wear a low-cut shirt. You wore the shirt, expect the looks. No, you should never be touched without permission, but looks… when you’re flaunting it. Get over it. Women in America today should read about women in other countries. If you want to be a REAL Women’s Activist stop complaining that men want to have “safe spaces” where they can talk to each other too, and start looking into child brides, and women being killed for the crime of being raped.

This new feminist wave loves to feel better than because they point out that staying home and having babies (a thing most women actually WANT to do) is a sign of the Patriarchy. No, it’s a sign of existence. Having babies is literally the only way existence continues, and here’s the thing. Once most women have babies, a lot of them would much rather stay home with them than go back to work. That’s the reason why the pay gap changes between men and women in their 30s. Women have babies. They take time off to have them. They take time off to raise them. They switch careers to have a more flexible schedule to stay with them. They do all of this, because they want to. Because they choose to. Because they love their babies. They don’t love the boardroom.

This is a fundamental difference between men and women. Sure, SOME women would choose a career over babies, just as SOME men would choose staying home with the babies over a career, but it’s not the norm. And yes, there is a norm. There are choices and ways of thinking that are more female and more male. It’s the reason that gender roles were created in the first place. Yes, they were a social design. Generation after generation men wanted to go out and fight, and work, and provide for their families, and women wanted to stay home and take care of their babies. This is why in a majority of cultures this is the norm. This wasn’t put upon people by White Anglo-Saxon Men. This same phenomenon happened in Asian countries, and African countries, and Middle Eastern countries, and the tribes that came over from Asian countries to eventually be called Native Americans. The same “Societal Creations” happened regardless of which society, because it’s also biological.

So, today, when you are looking for a feminist fight, don’t look at the guy sitting next to you in the cubical who held the door for you. Look to the countries and cultures that are still raping and selling women if you want to fight for your fellow woman. Unless you just want the big strong men to keep going to war for you.

pexels-photo-6055989.jpeg
bullying, Law of Attraction, Love, Mental Health, parenting, Prayer

Forgive and Forget

Katrina Russell

People talk a lot about forgiveness, and there are definitely two camps on this subject. Well, three if you count the people who keep forgiving over and over and not the forgetting part, but for this we won’t. For this we are talking about the people who are done taking flack and listening to lies.

In one camp there are the people who will never forgive. “Those *fill in expletive* don’t deserve my forgiveness”, people. The ones who every time a name is mentioned, even if it’s not the actual person, just the name in common, this one gets a knot in their stomach. This one has been hurt so badly they will never forget, and never give anyone else a chance to hurt them like that either. They will take that pain to the grave, and to whatever afterlife may come.

This is the one that tells you they are fine, while simultaneously screwing up something in their life. A friendship, a romantic relationship, a family situation, a job… something that reminds this one of that person who did that thing to them once and they are not going to let that happen again.

When that person or that subject does come up, this one still sees red. They can’t help it. It’s still so fresh in their mind and heart. They can’t let it go. They are angry and will continue to be angry. There is no way that this one is going to give that person the satisfaction of being let off the hook for the horrible thing that they did. That person is going to die knowing that this one hates them.

Of course, that person may not care, or even remember this one… but that’s not the point… this one will remember… always.

Then there are the ones that know how to forgive and how to forget. The ones who understand that everyone has faults, and everyone is at a different point in the evolutionary scale. This one knows what horrible thing that person did to them. This one knows that person is not capable of the actions or respect that this one deserves. This one feels almost sorry for the person who did them dirty, because this one understands that true happiness can never be found in hurting someone, and the person who hurt them will have to live with everything they do… but this one does not.

This one has learned holding onto a grudge only hurts the one holding on. This one forgives the person who wronged them… and then lets it go. That’s it. It is now a thing of the past. It no longer takes up room in their conscious mind. This one goes about their life not worrying about what the other person did or is doing now. This one goes about their life not assuming that everyone they meet will be like that person and hurt them.

Then there is a moment in this one’s life when they realize they have actually forgotten. Maybe they see that person at an event, or their name is brought up. This one smiles, asks how they are, and have a pleasant encounter. Maybe at some point someone reminds this one of what the other person has done. This one just laughs, and says, “well, it was a long time ago. We’ve all grown since then.”.

Maybe we’ve all grown, maybe that person is just as rotten and hurtful as they always were, but it doesn’t matter. This one has grown. This one has a good life. That person who hurt this one doesn’t have any power over this one. This one has forgiven and forgotten.

white concrete building
bullying, Politics, Prayer

It’s not about oppression, it’s about success

Katrina Russell

There has been a lot in the media in the last few years about the oppressed and the oppressors. How certain groups have more power and success in life because they spend all of their time oppressing other people. How there is a new group coming out of the oppressor group in order to “save” the historically oppressed people.

They are doing this by teaching people whether they are oppressed or oppressors, because nothing cures oppression like telling someone that they are oppressed and shouldn’t bother trying. They are also doing this by getting rid of tests and regulations that judge people based on the merit. The implication being that people of certain groups can’t be expected to live up to the expectations of the oppressor groups and therefore are being further oppressed by a society that values merit.

I’m not sure how teaching kids particularly that they are some how incapable of merit based accomplishments eliminates oppression, but that is the point. The people who talk so much about caring about and helping the oppressed don’t actually care about oppression. They only care about who is getting, making, or having more than they are. The goal is not to end oppression, but to oppress the successful in order to steal more power for themselves.

If you ever want to know how someone feels about oppressed people ask them what they think about the Jews, and specifically Israel. Jewish people are the historically the most oppressed people in the world. They were slaves in the age of the Bible. They have been homeless since they were first enslaved. They have been told they can’t work. They have been murdered. They have had an entire world against them, and yet they are the one group of people to never tried to conquer anyone else. That’s actually their thing. They don’t look to convert. They are a race unto themselves not just a religion. They don’t stop those who choose to convert, but they do not send people to your door on a Sunday afternoon, and they have never invaded anyone.

In 1948. after it as discovered that millions of them were killed for no reason, it was decided by the world that they needed a safe place they could call their own. People are angry about this. People are angry because a piece of land that had been historically Abrahamic territory, but was invaded and stolen by others was being returned to them. The same people who complain about Native American land being stolen by white settlers because, “The Natives were there first” complain that the Israelites got their land back. No race has ever been more cohesive than the Jewish people. They are not just a religion but a race as well, and they do their best to keep their way of life unchanged for centuries. Where as the Native Americans were thousands of different tribes who came to the American continent over thousands of years and spent most of that time killing each other to extinction.

Jewish people, however, are known to be hard working. It’s part of their culture. No matter how many times they are knocked down, they keep their heads down and keep working for their families and their faith… and they are hated for it. There is no group in the world so universally hated. There was just a hostage situation in TX in which a Muslim extremist specifically targeted a Synagogue on the Sabbath, and took hostages. The news kind of mentioned something about a UK man taking hostages but they weren’t sure why… it’s over now, it doesn’t really matter.

Except it does. This was a terrorist attack. This was a hate crime. The fact that a Muslim extremist specifically targeted a Synagogue on the holiest day of the week was not a coincidence, but let’s not make people think poorly of Muslim terrorist… that wouldn’t be PC.

If oppression, and not personal choices is what causes inequality and poverty then how does one explain the Jews. They are the doctors, the lawyers, the accountants. They run the banks. They are the evil rich people… who have been historically oppressed by everyone. People don’t want to help the oppress. They just hate the rich. If you don’t believe me. Ask them how they feel about Israel.